Are you one of those people who is naturally gifted at seeing others in need? Is your gift hospitality and you naturally see when someone needs a meal?
If so, I’m so jealous! Oh how I wish this was a natural gift of mine, but it’s not.
Making meals for others stresses me out! Crazy, I know. But seriously, it does. There seems to be such a beautiful art to it that I missed out on. The perfect meal, serving bowls, utensils, condiments, etc.
This past week I was made aware of a girl at our church who could use some help. She’s a mom and had just had a mild stroke. My heart ached for her.
She’s also a friend that I met a few years ago and I’ve witnessed her journey to becoming the person she is today. A beautiful journey I’ll have to share one day soon. In other words, I’m so proud of her! So I excitedly signed up to take a meal to her family. I couldn’t wait to bless them and visit with her.
I found myself eagerly flying around the grocery store picking up all the ingredients to make her family Taco Soup and Salad. One of my favorites, so I couldn’t wait to share! Maybe I could present a good meal for another after all?
I began cooking with all my special ingredients. A pinch here, a packet there, a can of this and a can of that. The ingredients were boiling when all the sudden it hit me . . .
What was I thinking?
I was making Taco Soup and Salad to take to a “real” mexican family. My heart began to pound as I remembered she had just told me a few days prior that she had a great mexican food recipe she wanted to share.
Y’all, I’m about as “white” as they come and I was taking a “white girls dish” of mexican food to a real mexican family that cooks real mexican food.
Oh heavens . . .
My mind started racing. I thought of ways to change the recipe, but it’s hard to disguise a mexican dish. I was in a panic!
Seriously, my thoughts were going crazy!
That’s when I began to think on this gift called hospitality. Since when did I let it be this art of perfection and bow out? When did I let the gift of serving another a meal become so complicated? When did I let my crazy thoughts overtake the love behind a meal?
As I simmered my meal and my wacky thoughts, I decided a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do . . .
laugh at myself!
I delivered the “white girls mexican food” and fixin’s and told her the story. She laughed! She declared she’d make me a “real” mexican dish one day soon. And as we sat and visited for a moment, I realized I almost missed this perfect moment.
I almost let my thoughts of perfection keep me from serving and loving on another.
And I have to say, that would have been this “white girl’s” loss!
Are you naturally gifted with the art of hospitality? If so, please send help!!! What’s your favorite meal to take another? Or what’s your favorite way to bless another family?
You just make me so glad you are my sister in the Lord, Alene.. Why? Because you let the REAL Alene come shining thru, no matter the situation.. You bring your whole heart, sin warts and all , and you present your true spirit of wanting to do what Jesus would do, no matter what.. And you know what? It doesn’t matter to Him if you’re a perfect housewife, a mediocre cook, or even one that doesn’t know the end of a wooden spoon, or mandolin.. What He sees, even in this blog post, is a desire to do the service God calls us to do- and thats just to love others just because He shows us the way to do just that.. SO, with your Taco soup, and your giving heart, I know your friend was blessed just because you wanted to serve she, and her family – just as if Jesus were handing her that perfectly created turine of soup , or whatever you served it in..
Ps. My favorite meal to serve others is real simple – anything that comes from my heart to theirs.. ( although I am one of those hospitality laden woman who love to cook, and do all that kinda stuff to make someone feel special, and loved ).. maybe I will share my actual recipes with you, or the gals on the Online FB page sometime?? that would be a hoot!!!!
Ah thanks! Being real is kind of excruciating!! Now everyone knows I’m a horrible cook and don’t like taking meals. But from this experience hopefully I have a better outlook on serving others through meals. White girls can cook! LOL
Recipes – especially quick and easy ones – would be fabulous!! You are definitely gifted in the hospitality area and I’m jealous! Share away girl – share away!
I am with you…I’d like to be natural about it, but it doesn’t come easily. In fact, I think there is a disconnect between seeing a need and thinking, I can do something to help! I usually, say, quite sincerely, “Please call if you need anything”. But, no one ever does….
My favorite go to meal when I’m helping someone out is to pick up a rotisserie Chicken from the store, bring a salad bread and dessert. I like to do what I can so they don’t have to worry about bringing me dishes back. I don’t want to give someone a chore. You know?
Your words “call me if you need anything” ring a bell within my soul. I say that too and I’m often envious of those who just jump in and do what needs to be done. They see the needs so naturally. I don’t. I was reminded of that tonight at Bible study — some girls just see needs so quickly and others don’t. But I want to challenge myself to see and then step out of my comfort zone to serve.
Don’t get me wrong – I serve in so many areas. It’s actually easier for me to take a meal to the streets than to cook a meal for a family. Weird, I know!!!
Awwww, Alene! That is so sweet! I am so glad you shared this. It’s funny and inspirational! I LOVE taco soup. We make it almost every week!
Thank you for always being so authentic. I sometimes write something on my blog and then find myself struggling to do the very thing I am encouraging. God whispers in my ear, “Excuse me? Are you going to say it or live it?” Sometimes the doing is so hard!
I love you! I started a Good Morning Girls bible study Monday. I am missing our study. In the GMG it is a little harder to connect with everyone.
I do a lot of cooking, and the meals I take are usually whatever kick I’m on at home. Sometimes it’s Italian, sometimes Cajun, sometimes soup, sometimes roast, and sometimes, Taco Soup!
Have a great week!
Girl, your words — “Excuse me? Are you going to say it or live it?” resonate deeply. I think it is the dilemma of being a teacher and writer. You know people are watching to see if your words match up to your actions. And so God continues to nudge us and remind us — to walk the walk. Talk truly is cheap.
I miss our online group!!! It was weird not being together tonight. I am excited about what’s coming and I look forward to more. I’m working on some Christmas lessons and devotionals now. I hope this proves helpful to others in keeping with a calmer more relaxed Christmas.
I’ve thought about doing studies off my blog, but I think the cool thing when we were all online was the community that was strengthened. Thoughts?
Yes, the sense of community when we are all online really is fellowship. It really enhances the experience. I think it is… when 2 or more are gathered….He is there.
I really enjoy your blog posts and devotionals, but the sense of fellowship in the on-line study is really encouraging and so needed.
I watch people. I observe closely. In my conversations and in what I see, day in and day out, is the common theme of a sense of isolation.
Often, even at church, conversation is superficial and studies are not designed for intimate sharing.
Maybe it is the anonymity in an online study that makes it easy to share your heart.
I cringe to say it, but unfortunately it is true. Christians persecute their wounded and weary.
And aren’t we all wounded and weary at some time?
It’s not His will, but it happens. When my husband had his affair, the group of women that were my friends deserted me because I chose to stay in my marriage with an unrepentant husband. They thought I should divorce him. They no longer called me when they got together and my child was no longer invited to play.
It was God’s protection for me. I couldn’t have stood up to their opinions of my marriage forever.
I still am certain that I did God’s will.
He hates divorce.
He is faithful when we are faithless. I found through study that He allows divorce, but I believe, if there is any way, He would have us stay the course.
But I digress!
All that to say, it is hard at church to open up and let everyone know your struggles. You may be ostracized for your struggles. Not openly. But no one wants to be burdened with someone that doesn’t have it all together. They want their kids to hang out with people that have it all together. They want to hang out with those that have it all together. I understand. Yet…..It makes it hard to the wounded to have the intimate fellowship that they need.
I hope I don’t sound too hardhearted.
I love the church. They mean well. They are good people. They love the Lord. People are busy. Life is hectic. We all need the Lord’s forgiveness and help!
I don’t know how I missed this girl! Yes yes yes – I agree on the heart of what you are saying. From my own experience I will say that finding a study you feel comfortable in is crucial. For years I sat in studies and felt so “weird.” Everyone seemed to have their act together and of course, I knew I didn’t!
When God began shoving me into women’a ministry and I resisted and argued and realized that God is a Bossy God and submitted — I vowed I’d be as real as I could be.
What I’ve learned is the more “real” we can be the more it opens the door for others to be “real” and find the peace they are looking for. Thankful you were in the study.
I laughed out loud!! It’s so nice to hear real thoughts!
I take casseroles: most requested is King Ranch Casserole. I usually double all recipes and divide into two “throw-away” dishes. One we keep for ourselves and the other goes in the freezer to give away. I didn’t learn this until I had my double mastectomy and one of the sweet ladies that was bringing me a meal told me how she does it.
It’s so awaesome to have people take care of the little things when you are in need. Whatever that might be. But, what I learned is that you (the one in need) has to be accept it. I didn’t want any help… too independent I guess or didnt want to bother anyone. But, I went to a CanCare meeting, and another survivor was stating how hard it was for her to let people help her. One of her relatives told her “it’s just as much a blessing for me to HELP you, as it is a blessing for you to RECEIVE it. Please, dont take my blessing away.” Wow, that hit home. I didn’t want to be responsible for someone missing out on their own blessing.
So, “white-girl” meal or not, You were blessed in giving your meal just as much as your friend was blessed receiving her meal. Jesus doesn’t care. He only wants us to bless each other.
Cracking up!! My real thoughts can be kind of crazy that’s why I only share a few. LOL
King Ranch Casserole is awesome! I have learned over the years to deliver what I take in throw=away items or in something I definitely don’t need back. Delivering dishes back to owners can be quite a chore.
LOVE THIS “it’s just as much a blessing for me to HELP you, as it is a blessing for you to RECEIVE it. Please, dont take my blessing away.” Wow, that hit home. I didn’t want to be responsible for someone missing out on their own blessing. — totally agree! Beautifully put. Love you girl.
I love taco soup. I think Mexicans eat white people Mexican food the way Chinese people eat Panda Express. You eat it for what it is and not what you think it should be. My brother in law is Mexican and he always laughs at my attempts to make my version of his favorites. But he eats them and likes them.
Hospitality is a beautiful thing. Perfection has no place in it, both people are being vulnerable to the gift given and the gift received.
I do not have the gift you seek and I’m a Mexican I always worry I’m going to kill someone with to much hot sauce. My stand by when I sign up to take a meal, I the frozen Stoffer’s Lasagna a Green Salad and Galic Bread. Unless it is one of the other 4 Mexican families in the congregation and then I take Green Enchiladas and Mexican Rice. More than that I’m scared to venture..
What a sweet story! Reading this, I thought of the times where I let my ideas of perfection stop me from blessing someone else — for fear of doing it wrong. So glad you did the good and right thing, blessing another even if it meant doing it “less-than” perfect. Well done, sister!!!
Love this post! I’ve recently been thinking about hospitality and you are so right! It IS a lost art form!! As a child, I remember spending quite a bit of time at the houses of friends after church socializing or going for walks. But today we so seldom do things like that. We’re so embarrassed by the messiness of our homes to invite anyone in. And we think that by replying to someone’s Facebook post that we have done our duty to keep in touch. I wonder how many people are lonelier today because of our lack of a hands on approach to hospitality?? Thanks for sharing! Love your blog!
Brenda – great insights!!! Where did we fall in to this trap of thinking everything had to be “perfect” before we could serve somebody else? I’ve fell for it too. Crazy! In the big scheme of things a clean house or a superbly cooked meal isn’t what matters, it’s rather the hearts that get ministered to. And oh my – I hadn’t even thought of what social media has done to our culture. WOW! I wonder what our kids will be like growing up use to connecting with others in 140 characters or sending a shout-out on facebook?